I love first birthdays.
Like, really love them. I love a first birthday so much I started a business to help other moms celebrate and cherish their babies and families with modern heirlooms!
There is something intangibly magical and especially meaningful about celebrating your baby turning one. They change so much in the first year, and it's almost impossible to comprehend that just 12 months ago, you were holding them for the first time.
This transition can feel both like whiplash and a tortoise race simultaneously, and this paradox is the reason that first birthdays break my heart just a little bit.
Don’t get me wrong, it's a joyful time and a gift to be able to celebrate your baby's first birthday. I get that. I agree with that. But it’s also bittersweet for a mom. It’s very possible to enjoy and celebrate the little one they’ve become, while also aching for the newborn they no longer are. Not to mention, there’s a lot to reflect on how not just your baby, but also you have grown in the first year of their life.
I’m a “savorer” by nature, and planning for my babies’ first birthday parties is one of the ways I enjoyed and processed them turning one. And, having done this three times now, I finally feel like a pro! I’ve learned something each time, and I’ve enjoyed each of their first birthdays in unique ways. I would love to be able to tell my younger self a few things that I've learned, so I've created a collection of my personal sentiments, lessons, and advice for moms planning their baby’s first birthday.
While this list is not exhaustive, these are my personal best tips–the things I would say if sitting down with a mom about to plan a party for her baby’s first birthday. Not every piece of advice will resonate with you, but I hope you’ll take away a tip or two that helps bring more meaning and joy to this very special day–however you choose to celebrate it.
While this may seem like a random thought, it’s for a very important purpose: to let you, the parents, enjoy the smash cake moment. No one delights in this first birthday experience as much as the parents, but as the hosts of the party, it can also feel like a lot of pressure to rush through it so you can serve cake to your guests.
I remember feeling this tug at my oldest’s first birthday, and I rushed more than I wanted to because of it. From then on, I asked someone else in advance (a grandmother or a close friend) to slice and serve the cake so I could be free to enjoy my baby’s smash cake for as long as I wished. This also has become my number one piece of advice for a mom planning a first birthday party!
While it may seem hard to imagine in the first few months of your baby’s life, a first birthday can actually sneak up on you. Some of the most special items you’ll keep from their first birthday celebration are personalized and can take time to create, and you don’t want to miss out because of timing. Set a reminder in your phone 6-8 weeks out from your baby’s birthday so you can get the things you really want without the stress of wondering if they’ll arrive on time.
Similarly, start a note in your phone or a bookmark in your web browser to save the things you see along the way that you love.Then, when you’re ready to purchase them, you’ll have your favorite options all right there. And of course, make sure you get your Namesake Celebrations Party Hat, Topper, and Banner –our first birthday essentials!
There is no right or wrong way to do the guest list, but I do recommend considering a few things to help create the best experience for your family on your child's first birthday. Do you and your spouse enjoy small, intimate get-togethers, big parties with everyone you know, or a mid-sized gathering somewhere in between?
I naturally fall on the “invite everyone I know” side of the equation, and my husband falls somewhere in between. We rode this line pretty easily, with our first and second born by inviting family and several friends with children. However, by the time our third born was turning one, we kept it small by only inviting our family and one other family that is our closest friends.
Think about how it will feel for you to host a certain-sized crowd, and evaluate if that will allow you to be present to enjoy this day with your baby the way you want. If not, make adjustments until it feels right. Looking back, I think each guest list was a good fit for us at that time, and I enjoyed different things about each experience.
On that note, if you’re planning your second, third, fourth (or more!) first birthday celebration, give yourself permission to choose a path different than before. You don’t have to invite all the same people to each party, and you don’t have to do the celebrations in the same format. Each baby and season for your family is unique, and you can decide what is right for you right now.
If being a parent has taught us anything, it’s that there are some things we simply cannot control–amiright?! This will be just as true on your child’s first birthday as it is on any other day. Some things will go as you planned, some things will not, and others will happen differently-but even better than you could’ve expected.
Heading into the day with a flexible attitude and grace for yourself, your baby, and those around you will lead to a much more enjoyable experience for everyone. I’m all for planning, but once the day arrives, open your hands and receive the gifts that are both expected and unexpected.
For example, at my third baby’s first birthday–he ended up getting messy enough smashing his cake that he needed a bath. I never would’ve “scheduled” bath time in the middle of the party, but I determined it was needed. The alone time with just me and him in the bathroom is one of my most special memories from that day. Had I been so focused on my plan that I didn’t allow for what naturally felt right, I might’ve felt stressed and missed the sweetness of this moment (and had to handle a very sticky baby along the way!).
As we established in point number 4, flexibility is key, but that doesn’t mean you can’t plan for what will set your baby up to be their best!
You can’t know how your child will respond to the attention and flow of their first birthday party, but you can try to schedule the day’s festivities at a time when they’re typically their happiest during the day. Consider morning and afternoon naps, and choose the window of time that is best for your family’s flow.
And again–be flexible! Nap time may just end up being off this day, and that’s ok too!
I love an adorably styled food table as much as the next gal, but make sure you don’t sacrifice all function for form! My bestie, Rachel, is SO good at thinking of her guests’ practical needs when hosting, and I’ve learned so much from her!
Both for your child(ren) and any others in attendance, make sure you have hassle-free, tasty snacks that kids enjoy.
My go-to’s for first birthdays (and children's parties in general) are applesauce pouches, string cheese, bagged chips or crackers, juice boxes or pouches, and clementines. Having snacks that most kids recognize and can handle mostly on their own will be a big win for you, the children, and their parents!
You will likely want a million photos of your baby’s first birthday, but you won’t want to spend the entire day being the one taking them! If you can appoint a trusted friend or family member or hire a photographer, you will feel at liberty to be present and enjoy the celebration!
Make a list of what is most important to you and a general timeline to give to the photographer (hired or appointed), so that you can feel confident that these special moments will be documented.
I’ve found that whether from a professional photographer or from a friend’s iPhone, looking back at photos and videos always transports me back and tells the story of the day in the sweetest ways, and I’m so thankful I have the footage of each first birthday party for my three children.
We hired Jana Musselwhite Photography for Hampton's first birthday photos. She took his newborn photos and has done family photos for us, so it was comfortable and special to have her with us to take these beautiful images! These memories are some of my greatest treasures.
As moms, we experience a lot of physical, mental, and emotional changes in our baby’s first year. It’s easy to put our own self care on the back burner, and in many ways that's just part of having a new baby. But when it comes to your child’s first birthday, I believe it’s a celebration for them and for you too!
Especially with a firstborn, it feels like such an accomplishment to make it through the first year together. Through all the newness, changes, and growth, you reached a milestone, and that is worth celebrating.
This is an important moment, and you'll thank yourself for taking time to select an outfit that makes you feel good. Here are a few things to consider:
Three first birthdays in, I’ve learned a lot about which aspects of hosting parties I enjoy and am good at, as well as which ones I don’t like and need help executing.
For me, the theme, aesthetic, details, and sentimental moments come easily. The food, timeline, and space set up/flow are harder to coordinate. I tend to think of form first, function last, and it helps me to have additional minds and hands to make sure I’ve covered the logistical areas well!
Here’s what I like to DIY:
Here’s what I like to hire:
You can mix and match or add to or subtract to this list all day long! The important thing is to find the combination that plays to your strengths and supports your weaknesses.
There are so many ways to celebrate your baby’s first birthday, and it can be easy to get distracted by what other people do or with what you see online. There is nothing wrong with taking inspiration as long as it doesn’t overtake you. Similarly to how we approached the guest list, take time to consider what matters to you and what you want to prioritize for that day.
For me, as a designer and creator, I love thinking about all the little details and coordinating how the day will look and feel. I think through themes, colors, treats, decor, invitations, and keepsakes, and this delights me and is natural to me.
There are so many ways to do this meaningfully, and you get to choose.
There are so many ways to do this meaningfully, and you get to choose.
I hope from this list, you’ve received the main message underlying every point:
Let grace abound and focus on love. What matters most is being with your baby and celebrating your miraculous, beautiful first year together.
What are your best tips for planning a first birthday or what questions do you have? I would love to hear, and I know other readers will appreciate your advice and questions in the comments too!
Mattye Woodcock
Mom of three and Founder of Namesake Celebrations, Mattye has been a collector of keepsakes since childhood, valuing the way tangible goods connect us to moments in our lives and help us savor and share our stories. By honing in on her classic and romantic style, she partners with other female creators to bring Namesake’s modern heirlooms to life through sewing and embroidery.
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